This breakup play book is for boys, men and everyone in between. Dating simply put is a trial of two personalities . Whether it begins with physical or emotional attraction the goal is to see how long you can tolerate having someone to answer to before getting bored or pissed off.
This guide is to help you through the process if and when the moment comes where you feel suffocated, bored, uninterested or simply can’t stand looking at the other person any longer. There is one simple rule to winning this game and coming out the other end in one piece. Whoever breaks up first wins.
If you’re late to the play you will be the loser. Forever. For the rest of her existence your reputation from anyone she comes in contact with will be destroyed. They’ll wonder what’s wrong with you because the description will always be..”we used to date. I broke up with him” Bam. Instant loser. Forever.
Assuming you play the game correctly and break it off first prepare for her to lose her shit! The prettier the girl the crazier you can expect the reaction. Daddy problems? Hold on to your hat boys because you’re in for a ride!! Your phone will blow up. Block her number? She’ll use another. Expect blocked calls, prank calls, etc.
If you manage to not cave and answer a call the friends will start calling..telling you how much she loves you and what a piece of shit you are for not just talking.
Still standing? It’s not over..now your friends will start getting calls. Some begging for them to talk..some she’ll try to hook up with in a pathetic desperate attempt to make you jealous or angry. If you cave..you lose! Most likely your she’s already hooked up with someone so you’re now hitting up sloppy seconds. Think about it..whatever you were doing in that brief time apart..she was probably doing the same thing..with someone other than you. Ew.
Assuming your still standing you’ll probably start hearing stories of her succeeding fucking your friends. If you get mad at your friend…She wins (cutting off the friend doesn’t count..breaking his nose is a win on her end). If you manage to succeed keeping it calm and not crawling back in to the next stage of the game.
The final straw. At this point your probably losing your shit. It’s going against everything you are not retaliating. She’s in your head. She knows it. Now come the drive byes. The stalking of your house. The random texts. Fake social media accounts friend requests. The girl suddenly calling and hitting on you that’s probably sitting on her couch while she does it. You’ll see her coincidentally popping up at every social gathering waiting for a reaction in a desperate attempt to get you back.
Still standing?? You win! Congratulations! She’ll slowly wind down as her friends will turn from “Don’t give up” to “Move on girlfriend! You’ve gone too far”. Peace at last. Go out with the boys and celebrate!
If you fail the steps and take her back you lose!! The excuses you will make..let’s see..
1. I just wanted to hook up with her one more time. Translation: you lost
2. Answer the phone screaming at her or have a girl call her/go to her to set her straight: you lose! She’ll twist this into seeing you as crazy and it being her decision.
3. “I felt bad and just wanted to talk to her.” Loser!! She won. Instantly. Now it’s a tie. In her eyes you mutually agreed to part ways.
4. The ultimate mistake..”I made a mistake. I got back with her. She’ll be different “. WRONG! You lose!! Your sorry ass was just set up to get sucked back in so she can dump you! Might be as soon as tomorrow or months down the line..but it’s happening and you’re the loser. The one she dumped. The permanent check mark next to her name for a job well done.
At this point you may want to take a break before playing again. Go out with your friends. Go to the gym. Go on vacation. Do whatever it takes to restart the flame in your soul that was destroyed. Some flames take time to rekindle. Everyone heals differently. If your experiencing physical or emotional stress longer than the length your relationship was you may want to seek professional help to talk or medicate her out of your head. Theres still hope. Don’t give up. Good luck.
The Story Of Maverick 